I don't really care about reciprocation so much - but have cut a few people from my invite list for our annual party over it. One was out with me and some other friends at a bar and they all were telling her how nice her party was the previous weekend. I hadn't been invited, no big deal but it kind of stung. When she told me how they love coming to my party I thought that it was weird, an awkward segue, but ok? So, weeks later as we planned our annual party and approached the cut off numbers, due to space, I left her family off.
Another friend that had moved back to town and I had hosted for meals, holiday meals, taken out to lunch was having a party. It would have been ok by me to either not invite me or to just invite me and my husband. But - he felt the need to call me up and tell me that he wouldn't be inviting my family as there are too many of us to feed. What? Why tell me about what you aren't inviting me to? My kids are all older and wouldn't have come anyways, unless they were forced and pleaded with.
It comes down to the thought that counts for me. I don't expect tit for tat, keeping score, or the same level of hosting. But I do expect that if you come to my home over and over again that you would want me at your party. If not? I won't just cut you off, but it is odd and a bit hurtful.
Wow. Unreal.
1st story: Do you still speak to your friend? Did she ever say anything about not being invited to your party?
2nd story: 
Wow. Just wow. Do you still speak to him?
I agree, it really is the thought that counts.
I don't think I'd be speaking to either of them ever again, but I know with absolute certainty that I'd never invite them to another of my own parties or for a meal! They are clods! Hard to believe there are people who exist that are that clueless!
Yep, clods. The first was/is more of a "mean girl" type, I'm just not cool enough to warrant an invite and really should (in her opinion) be pretty grateful to have such a high social status person coming to my annual party. Umm...... I'll pass and have been spending my time with my lower status friends (wink wink). She actually asked a mutual friend why she wasn't invited, if it was just an oversight?! The mutual friend asked me and I told her that we just could not fit anyone else so sorry. I don't see either of them anymore, as I don't have the desire.
The second friend wormed his way into my last party, by calling up a mutual friend to find out the date. He rsvp'd to it - he hadn't been invited, but I decided to just let him come out of pity. But that mutual friend is in the know now and is to tell him that she hasn't heard. When he asks me about it, which he will, I'm going to tell him that we aren't having a big party anymore. Sorry. I don't see him at all anymore because he really really pissed me off by trying to also worm his way into my old college girlfriend get togethers. He met them that night - wth. I did immediately tell him no and that he would never be allowed to come with us, in a "joking" manner. He also made sure to post a picture of me at my party on facebook and tagged me - so there are people we went to elementary school with that weren't invited and now think that this annual party is some kind of fabulous event. It is not! It's a simple cook out, bon-fire in the woods, and we have like 25 or so people come.
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